A spokesperson for Buckingham Palace has confirmed that Queen Elizabeth II will use this year’s Christmas message to announce that she is blocking the United Kingdom’s exit from the European Union. 

Royal Communicatory Secretary Sir Humphrey Annieton added that the decision had been taken under the Royal Prerogative Act of 1964. 

He said: ‘In extreme circumstances when Her Majesty believes that it is in the national interest, she deserves the right to overrule any governing body that forms the legislative landscape of the United Kingdom.’

‘I am prepared to go on record and say that this particular conversation took place during a news bulletin about the recent Supreme Court case regarding the role of MPs and their right to a vote on the matter.’

‘Shortly before Emmerdale came on, she remarked that as the ‘ruddy queen’ she has the authority to intervene when ‘these silly sods can’t sort things out for themselves.’

‘After all, what’s the point in having a queen if she shies away from making big decisions. She is currently writing an official letter to Nigel Farage advising him that his British citizenship has been revoked.’ 

‘I’ve seen Liz get worked up like this before – she’ll probably try and get him beheaded or something.’

Royal commentator Henry Sikofant said that this was a ‘momentous day’ for the United Kingdom. 

He said: ‘Of course Her Majesty should intervene. She should be made a dame for her services to politics.’