Members of the public have been calling for an urgent investigation or a full enquiry after it was announced that Honey G, a contestant in the 2016 series of X-Factor, is to be made a Dame of the British Empire in the 2017 list of New Year’s Honours. 

According to the official documents from Her Majesty’s Royal Commission of Honours and Honouring, a dame hood will be ‘bestowed upon Mrs Honey Gumbleby (her full name) for her services to British popular music and entertainment.’

A source within the commission told our Chief Reporter that Queen Elizabeth II made the recommendation personally without any form of support from the wider panel of honour judges – a move that goes against official protocol. 

He added: ‘It is already well-known that Her Majesty never misses an episode of The X-Factor, and on the night that Honey G was eliminated she was angrier than I have ever seen her before.’

‘She was pretty mad on the night that Charles introduced her to Camilla, but this was something else. The remote control missed one of her Corgis by a matter of inches.’

‘Within a few minutes of Honey G’s on-screen farewell, she contacted Simon Cowell and demanded her full reinstatement on the show. When he refused, she told him that his knighthood had ‘gone for a Burton’ and immediately put the paperwork in motion for Honey G instead.’

‘It’s a huge honour for the singer. As Dame Helen Mirren will tell anybody, becoming a dame brings a huge range of benefits to go along with the sense of achievement.’

‘Not only can you get all of your debit cards reprinted with the special prefix, but you also receive a lifetime’s 50% discount at Subway, a 6-month subscription to Which magazine, and access to more than 150 airport lounges across Europe during off-peak periods, space permitting.’

‘The Parker pen set comes in handy as well.’