A source within Southend Borough Council has told our news team that there is currently a high level of panic within Civic Centre after a group of pilots announced on Facebook that they intend to hold an UNAUTHORISED AIRSHOW on May Bank Holiday.
According to a Facebook group that has been set up, a group of British pilots were inspired by motorbike enthusiasts who descended upon Southend in their hundreds for the Easter Monday ‘unauthorised’ Southend Shakedown.
Alan Chucks-Weigh is in charge of the unauthorised event, and he said: ‘What those bikers have done today is extraordinary.’
‘The local council and police said ‘don’t come,’ but against all odds and adversity they all came anyway.’
‘If they can do it with a little motorbike, just imagine what we could do with propellor based aircraft, fighter jets, maybe even passenger aeroplanes.’
‘What the hell are they going to do? Just stick a man with a clipboard in a helicopter and ask them to fly somewhere else?’
‘The local authority won’t even need to go to the trouble of providing air for us to fly in, as it will already be there anyway directly above the Seafront.’
We asked our council source if there are any emergency measures being considered to stop the unauthorised event.
He said: ‘To be honest, we did see the event pop up on Facebook but we mistakenly assumed that it would be an air show, as opposed to an airshow.’
‘We did think that it was a bit odd. Why would people put air in little jars and show them off to people?’
‘Having said all of that, we’ve put a cultural centre at the end of a pier that is now completely devoid of any culture, so anything must possible these days.’
In a late development, an unspecified plastics company has confirmed that an order has been received for a set of 800ft-high traffic cones.
It is currently unclear where these will be heading.