A leaked email has confirmed that the Conservative government managed to fund their £1bn House of Commons deal with the DUP by having Prime Minister Theresa May replaced with an inflatable talking sex doll.

According to documents that have been seen by Southend News Network, the funding has been possible by not having to pay Mrs May’s salary and a generous sponsorship and product placement deal by the doll’s manufacturer Maybotty Enterprises of Tokyo.

A source said: ‘We first became suspicious when she kept coughing during her speech at the Tory Party Conference the other day.’

‘It has now become clear that this particular robot was a refurbished model that was probably not cleaned out properly by the previous owner.’

‘Those letters behind her all fell off because she was giving out a large dose of electromagnetic radiation, and when her speech was interrupted by someone with the P45 she just carried on as thankfully Philip was still holding the remote control.’

‘For a number of months now, we have been wondering why Mrs May has kept repeating certain phrases over and over again, and a friend has told me that it is down to a faulty TX564738 chip – this is similar to the one that Kryten uses in Red Dwarf.’

A spokesperson for Maybotty Enterprises of Tokyo said that sales of the robot are booming as a result of the deal, with more than £500,000 in sales coming every single week from Oxfordshire.

He added: ‘We are about to release a limited edition model of the robot with an exclusive defecation expansion pack that is programmed to shit on the poor.’