The outcome of the EU Referendum has been thrown into CHAOS this evening after more than TWO MILLION voting papers were uncovered in a skip in a quiet suburb of Southend On Sea. A representative of the Electoral Commission confirmed that the papers haven’t been counted, and an urgent investigation is now underway to find out how so many papers could have been misplaced.

Nathan Cache is a political science student living in Hamstel Road, just a few metres from where the skip was discovered. He said: ‘I looked out of my front window just after lunchtime as a lot of people were gathering around the skip that has been on our pavement for the last four or five days. There was a huge commotion when my neighbour saw a few voting slips on the top, and it soon emerged that there were possibly thousands in there. I couldn’t believe it when armed police arrived and suggested that there were more than two million polling papers just dumped in a skip.’

An Electoral Commission official said: ‘As the number of uncovered papers far outweighs the eventual winning margin, we have removed the papers to a secret location for counting. In the event that the overall result needs to be changed, we will make an announcement as soon as possible. In the meantime, we are studying local CCTV footage carefully to find out how the papers got there – we are following a few lines of enquiry.’

A spokesperson for David Cameron said he would withdraw his resignation if the result is changed after the recount. A spokesperson for Jeremy Corbyn said he would still rebuild his cabinet and then probably have to rebuild it again.