Mike Pike, a commodities broker or something like that, was approaching the ticket barrier at Tower Hill station to change onto the C2C line at Fenchurch Street earlier today, and he was approached by an individual who handed over the flyer.
He said, ‘I was talking into my phone at a reasonable volume about a new Burberry paint job for my Audi, and someone walked up to me and discreetly slipped the card into my free hand. It just ranted on about how get-rich-quick brokers and glorified 80’s throwback barrow-boys are a general stain on humanity – it was proper racist ‘n all.’
Mr Pike continued, ‘I worked hard to get where I am today and I don’t need some idiot with a Vistaprint account coming up to me and telling me that I am any less of a man because I am from Essex.’
‘My firm spent £8000 in one night last week at a bar up West somewhere – we are practically propping up the UK economy single-handed.’
A spokesperson from the British Transport Police confirmed that they are investigating the incident as a matter of urgency.
They also added, ‘Commuters from Essex have just as much of a right to use the London Underground as people from Kent, Surrey, Middlesex and indeed any other county. Significant amounts of the District Line and the Central Line are in Essex anyway.’
‘OK it’s the permatanned nail bar and Towie bit and not the salt of the earth Fish and Chips bit, but it is Essex nonetheless.’