Get your 2017 off to the best possible start with our revolutionary new JuicyJuiceJuice® weight loss and detox plans – we’ll show you how to can lose anything up to A STONE every single week by swapping your regular meals for JuicyJuiceJuice® shakes and capsules.
Brand new for this year, we are also delighted to announce that JuicyJuiceJuice® tabs and nasal powders are now available for those times when you really need to accelerate your weight loss!
Southend News Network readers can benefit from a wide range of offers to help them with their New Year’s Resolutions, and anyone can use our products to slim down for Summer 2017. Imagine hitting the beach with a toned tummy and generally feeling like a worthwhile human being – JuicyJuiceJuice® will make this a reality!
JuicyJuiceJuice® products are all backed with science and nutritional principles to make that stubborn fat melt away – the secret is our patented and copyrighted JuicyJuiceJuice JuiceSplit Formula. It is classed as a ‘made-up’ product by the UK Pharmaceutical Authoriity, and this is because it is essentially made-up of some of the most revolutionary products that money can buy.
JJJ Trim® targets fat on your tummy tum, JJJ Lightning® hits fatty deposits on your thighs, JJJ Thermoblast® is scientifically formulated for your buttocks, JJJ Clusterfunk® smashes stubborn fat under your chin, and finally JJJ Pendula® will trim your bingo wings with ease.
However, JuicyJuiceJuice® isn’t just about weight loss – it is also about promoting a generally healthy lifestyle and our products can resolve health issues in a way that regular Western medicine can only dream of!
Our regular customers include eczema sufferers who have been cured by our 100% naturally natural formula, and we have thousands of testimonials from people who praise JuicyJuiceJuice® for curing respiratory complaints, general aches and pains, and we even had a paraplegic who is now starting to walk again after just three weeks on JuicyJuiceJuice® – throw that wheelchair away sister!
Now here’s the best part … although other similar products can be costly and expensive and pricey for regular mummies and mums, JuicyJuiceJuice® is fantastic value for money! Our plans start at just £20 per week, which is the same price as 20 bags of M&Ms if you buy them from Poundland!
If you want to split the cost with a friend, why not choose our fantastic BestieBestBest package where you start with a loved one or bestie and divide the cost between you. For example, if two of you join at the same time you can have half of the overall product each and pay half of the amount each – this is revolutionary stuff ladies 🙂 If four of you join, the cost goes down even more!
You may not have heard of JuicyJuiceJuice® before as we haven’t been on Watchdog yet, and we only operate through network marketing methods – this is why JuicyJuiceJuice® is also a fantastic business opportunity for busy mums who are so busy mumming that they don’t have the time to work in a regular business setting.
While other weight loss franchises operate in a pyramid layout, we do things differently. Once you have purchased your JuicyJuiceJuice® distributor pack for £199.99 (WARNING THIS WILL GO UP TO £399.99 ON JANUARY 7TH), you will enter our unique business structure called the Ever-Widening Downward JuicyJuiceJuice® Triangle Of Prosperity – pyramid schemes are so last year!
If you are already on Facebook anyway, you might as well start making money for it. Because of the law in the United Kingdom, we are not allowed to make specific promises about how much you could earn with JuicyJuiceJuice®, but we can accurately predict that you will earn loads.
You will start out as a JuicyJuiceJuice Vice-President®, before hitting the rank of JuicyJuiceJuice® President once you reach £1000 of sales in your first three months. At £2500 and three new recruits underneath you (within six months), you will become a JuicyJuiceJuice® High Commander, and once you hit £10000 (within a year) and have a team of twelve recruits you will become an official JuicyJuiceJuice® Admiral – our Admirals get cruises and tiaras and stuff.
At £20000 and a team of 24 reps with at least six reps underneath each rep and then a further three reps underneath each of these reps and then two reps underneath each of these reps (within 18 months) you hit our highest rank – JuicyJuiceJuice® Lord Universal Megagod.
JuicyJuiceJuice® LUMs are very, very special. Just for starters, you can dine with our board of directors at our annual JuicyJuiceJuice® Action Conference in some big exhibition centre somewhere.
You also get a Swarovski pin badge to show everyone that you are a LUM, a monthly teeth whitening cosmetic dentistry session for life, a branded Fiat Punto, and a 24-hour personal protection officer.
You may think that you need loads of qualifications and experience to start your JuicyJuiceJuice® journey, but you only need two things. First of all, you need to have a dream. Just sit down with a blank piece of paper, take a thick marker pen and write down how much money you would like to earn in a single year. Now, take that number and multiply it by 7.25 – this is the average amount that JuicyJuiceJuice® reps can earn.
The second thing that you need is some sort of Internet access, preferably Wi-Fi as this means that you can move around your house and carry out your JuicyJuicePlus® activities. Our analysts have discovered that reps earn 43% less when they are on a fixed device that connects through an Ethernet cable, so please bear that in mind.
Whether you contact me as a potential customer or a potential JuicyJuiceJuice® rep, I want you to bear one simple phrase in mind. Aim high, then aim a bit higher, then take a step back and a deep breath and aim even higher, then have a sit down with a cup of JuicyJuiceJuice® Herbal Tea and aim higher than the highest point in the universe.
To find out more, please email email@example.com. I will personally reply as soon as I can and let you know how you can get started.
TO OUR SUCCESS! Michelle Ponzi-Culter, JuicyJuiceJuice® LUM