Friends and family of 27-year-old Brian Emery from Southend On Sea are reportedly ‘furious’ with Channel 5 after the ‘intelligent and hard-working’ father of two suffered severe brain damage when his fiancée Sharice forced him to watch a single episode of Celebrity Big Brother.
His sister Janice told our Chief Reporter that doctors have already delivered the news that he may never recover.
She said: ‘Sharice asked him if they could catch-up with an episode of Celebrity Big Brother before bed, and a couple of minutes later she looked at him and notice that he had a slightly glazed expression.’
‘She kept poking him with the remote control to try and get him to respond, and at this point he just started foaming at the mouth and rolling around on the floor.’
‘They called an ambulance and he was rushed to Southend Hospital for scans and tests.’
Dr Daniel Smeech is the lead clinical clinician of neurological clinics at Southend, and he told our Chief Reporter that a number of similar cases have been reported since the return of Loose Women and Real Housewives of Whereverthefuck.
He said: ‘The problem with thundershite like Celebrity Big Brother is that TV executives have to formulate each show so that it can be understood by viewers with an IQ lower than a stick of celery.’
‘As Celebrity Big Brother is basically a procession of penises and vaginas on legs with an amazingly unhealthy desire to exchange bodily fluids before getting a spin off, viewers need to be able to identify the warning signs and take action as early as possible.’
‘Anyone who is able to count higher than one without using fingers may find that their minds are significantly understimulated by the content, and in around half of adults that can actually lead to brain cells screaming ‘bugger this’ and breaking down.’
‘I have contacted Channel 5 and asked them to broadcast a warning before Celebrity Big Brother in future, but in the meantime if you turn it on and notice yourself or your loved one beginning to dribble and make a noise like a cow who is about to nod off to sleep, you need to quickly change the channel or swap your eye wash for a bottle of Domestos.’