The owners of one of the leading lettings agencies in Essex have hit out at government plans to scrap one-off fees for new tenants – they argue that there is ‘zero profit’ in changing £500 to press a button. 

Colin York and Michael Hunt of York Hunt Lettings told Southend News Network that their package fee of £500 per new tenant is fair and justified. 

Colin added: ‘This government meddling could put us out of business, especially at a time when it has never been more expensive to maintain a fleet of Mini Coopers.’

‘When a new tenant signs up, there is a monumental amount of work that goes into pressing that button. First of all, we have to locate the button on the keyboard, and then we have to extend an index finger and apply a small amount of downward force.’

‘We have a sales office next door, and occasionally one of our team will have to drop everything and go and fellate someone who walks through the front door for their 1% – it’s brutal out there.’

Co-owner Michael added: ‘Losing out on £500 per new tenant will hit us really hard in the pocket. It can be very costly to find a guarantor who owns their own home, earns more than £400m per year and is prepared to forego a limb in the event of non-payment.’

‘If only there was some sort of recurring monthly payment for the tenant where we could add on this lost revenue. Some kind of system where the £500 could be divided by six or twelve and then evenly distributed across the length of the tenancy.’