A spokesperson for Lego has confirmed that a limited edition UNITED AIRLINES PLAYSET will be available in toy shops before the end of April.
The Danish toy maker confirmed that 10,000 of the sets will be available, with the kits designed to promote a wide variety of educational values.
Spokesperson Ivan Chukimov added: ‘We are incredibly excited about this new kit that is compatible with a number of other Lego airport playsets.’
‘Children can immerse themselves in a fantasy world where their hand-eye co-ordination will benefit from pretending a forcibly remove a distressed Asian figure against its will.’
‘We would encourage kids to ask nicely first as Lego are all about promoting values of decency above profit.’
‘As a special bonus, anyone buying the set at Smyths Toys will receive a free Daily Mail Dark Past Expansion Pack.’
‘This kit ties in nicely with the creative writing syllabus of the National Curriculum at Key Stage 2, and it allows children to use the medium of mistaken identity to label the bloodied figure as anything from a paedophile to a mass-murderer.’
‘Each pack has a barcode that you can scan with a smartphone app to randomly generate an apology.’
‘For example, these range from ‘they all look the same to me’ to ‘but his name has six separate names in it as well.’
‘High Court Libel Trial playsets are sold separately.’
The announcement comes just six months after Lego had to withdraw their British Airways playset after the airline threatened legal action over ‘gross inaccuracies.’
According to court papers seen by our news team, senior BA figures objected to the playset’s depiction of luggage arriving in the same destination as the aircraft’s passengers.