A horse who spends the majority of his time tied up in a field next to Purdeys Industrial Estate in Rochford, Essex, has hit out at critics who have accused him of being ‘abused’ or ‘dead’ in the last few weeks. In an EXCLUSIVE interview with Southend News Network, Dobbin McHoofson has admitted that although he is incredibly bored, he is very happy to enjoy a life next to the Prittle Brook where he is well cared for at all times.

We caught up with Mr McHoofson just as he was finishing a hearty lunch of grass and some more grass, and he said: ‘I am sick and tired of seeing post after post on local Facebook groups where people are saying that I am ill, or even dead. From time to time, I like to take a nap in the middle of the day, and in order to do this I have to lay down on the floor with my eyes shut. For some reason, people then drive past and assume that I must be dead as I am not moving, but if they just got out of their cars and wandered over to see me they would be able to hear me snoring. To be fair, my excessive snoring lead to my last marriage breaking down, so it must be pretty terrible!’

He added: ‘I do get very bored living here, and the only highlight of my day comes between 5pm and 6pm when I am pretty much guaranteed to be able to see a procession of idiots who seem to have no idea how to take a mini-roundabout. This phenomenon has puzzled people in Rochford for ages, but for some reason able motorists seem to forget how to use a three-way mini roundabout when they are leaving Purdeys Industrial Estate. It’s not just mummies leaving Fun Factory that seem to struggle, but pretty much anyone can suddenly forget how to rotate their head to the right and use the little stick just to the left of their steering wheel.’


  1. “see a procession of idiots who seem to have no idea how to take a mini-roundabout”

    From behind perhaps?

  2. I understand this horse as my husband complains of boredom when he is tied up too albeit in the cellar.

    He thinks I enjoy kinky sex but really I can just get on and watch Eastenders in peace without picking his nose accompanied to the noise of him belching and farting from his armchair.

    In fact the horse sounds far more cultured. Does he like Eastenders?