A spokesperson for The English Academy has confirmed that the word ‘have’ will be replaced with ‘of’ in December 2019.
According to a statement given earlier today by the academy’s Grand Linguist Sir Nigel Nougatti, the decision has been taken to try and cut down on the number of ‘vicious incidents of cyberbullying’ that have occurred after confusion between the two words on Facebook.
Sir Nigel added: ‘Language is an evolving organism, and when enough people use a word outside of its intended usage there will always be calls for the dictionary to be changed.’
‘As an added bonus, it should also cut down on the sheer number of people who should ‘illiterate moron’ whenever someone says ‘I should of waited before giving my baby solids’ on Facebook.’
‘Modern British society is all about embracing differences and cutting down on hatred, and there is a huge divide at the moment in this county between people who can speak English properly and those who think that ‘defiantly’ is a word that is used when you are 100% sure of something.’
‘This discrimination stops today.’
Although both words will continue to be valid in their own individual contexts, the official Oxford English Dictionary will be updated to state that ‘of’ is a valid component of the conditional perfect tense.
Sir Nigel also pointed out that the main debating topic of the August 2017 English Congress will be the proposed consolidation of ‘there, their and they’re’ into a single term.
A proposal to add the term ‘lack toast and tolerant’ to the Lancet Glossary of Medical Terms was rejected in 2016 after concerns that its introduction would lead to long-term neurological disorders amongst the general public.