There are growing concerns about an 83-year-old man who is trapped underneath a mountain of Quality Street boxes in Tesco in Southend.
Shortly after 3pm on Saturday afternoon, witnesses described seeing an ‘avalanche’ of confectionery close to the store’s main entrance, with one person stating that it was a falling tub of Celebrations from a neighbouring display that triggered the disaster.
One said: ‘We keep hearing faint noises from within Ground Zero, and a couple of rescue dogs have already barked to show that there are still signs of life in there.’
‘Unfortunately it isn’t as simple as just removing a load of the containers to get him out as the shop manager has warned us that some of the seals have broken in the initial accident.’
‘The risk of being hit by a falling Toffee Penny are now too great to proceed without specialist rescue apparatus that is being rushed across from Snowdonia National Park.’
According to the Supermarket Point Of Sale Injury Reduction Alliance, this was ‘an accident that has been waiting to happen for some time.’
SPOSIRA spokesperson Jason Argonaut added: ‘Every year, the major supermarkets all seem to complete with each other to see who can come up with the tallest confectionery mountain to create a distraction from the 50 grams of chocolates that seem to naff off with each new festive season, and it was only a matter of time before someone got seriously injured.’
‘The only responsible display that I have seen so far in December was a pile of Toffifee boxes in Aldi.’
‘Nobody has been injured by those yet, but then again nobody has gone anywhere near them because they are wank.’