A spokesperson for the FA has confirmed that that England football team has gone into administration after the sacking of Sam Allardyce this evening.
As a result, England have been docked 20 points for the remainder of the World Cup qualifying campaign, and the team will also be forced to start again in the Sunday League after the qualifiers are over.
A statement said: ‘All of England’s main financial backers have pulled out because of the negative publicity associated with Allardyce’s actions, and as a result we have been left with no choice but to put the team into administration as we are unable to meet our debt repayments on the newly-developed Wembley Stadium.’
‘The current squad have all had their contracts terminated, and we have plans to play our home matches at Roots Hall until a more permanent solution can be found.’
‘We are also beginning the search for a new manager as a matter of urgency, and a three-man panel has been established to try and find someone who isn’t a greedy bastard.’
‘The newly-formed national team will be called something along the lines of England or Anglo Wanderers – this is a matter for our legal team to discuss with UEFA and FIFA.’
‘If these two governing bodies choose to revoke our licence, we will continue to play our games on the Sunday League and then work our way up the football pyramid.’
A source close to Wayne Rooney confirmed that the player is in ‘advanced talks’ to join DR Congo as a free agent.