Due to the unprecedented numbers of Kent residents trying to enter Essex illegally through the Dartford Tunnel, government officials in Essex have been forced to take drastic action in order to discourage would-be Thames crossers from making the perilous journey.

In a last-minute plan, a major marketing campaign has been launched on all TV channels in Kent to show the ‘Essex Is Crap’ song from the 90’s ITV show Spitting Image – the song can be viewed below. It is hoped that the content of the song will be enough to convince the population of Kent that Essex really isn’t the gold-plated paradise that everyone seems to think it is.

Shane Cortina, an Essex government official, explained the decision to use the song. He said, ‘We have been under an incredible amount of pressure in the last few days to try and convince people in Kent that Essex really isn’t all that it is cracked up to be – Kent is very much the garden of England, while Essex is merely the patio.’

What do you think of the video? Will it stop Kentish residents from crossing the Thames? Let us know what you think on our Facebook page and if your comment is good enough, we may even cut and paste it to make the public believe that we came up with it first.



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  1. Oh come on its not all bad look at the great publicity we had for Dale Farm and we’ve got Towie, how many places can boast such fame!
    We’ve got loads of chavs and nearly everybody now drives a range rover or BMW since mondeo man grew up.
    We’re really friendly yeah, we always give lots of kisses xxx