A recently-married couple’s dream home in Westcliff On Sea is now laying in ruins after it collapsed under the weight of take away leaflets earlier today. 

Donna and Keith Wallace only moved into the two-bed semi in Fairfax Drive a week ago, and luckily both of them managed to escape before the disaster happened. 

Holding back tears, Donna said: ‘When we moved in last week, the first thing that we did was to collect up all of the take away leaflets that had been delivered in the three days since our last viewing – there must have been more than a hundred there.’

‘We were woken up at 6am this morning by a creaking noise, and when we got downstairs we just stood there and watched leaflet after leaflet falling onto the doormat. Chinese, kebabs, Indian, fish and chips, pizza, Chinese pizza, and many more just one after the other.’

‘We couldn’t pick them up as quickly as they were coming through the letterbox.’

Keith added: ‘It was like Moses holding back the tide. When re realised that we couldn’t pick them up quickly enough, we noticed that the creaking noise got louder and louder, and so we ran outside as we had a bad feeling that sometime was going to happen.’

‘Once we were standing in the street, the walls just fell apart and the whole house collapsed right in front of us – we could have both been killed.’

‘We even had a sign up saying ‘NO LEAFLETS’ but none of the buggers can read English.’

Fairfax ward councillor Percy Slodge (IND) said: ‘The sheer number of take away leaflets in Westcliff and Southend is creating a huge problem for homeowners.’

‘When you consider that Chinese restaurants like The Golden Carpet are giving out calendars on 300 gsm cardboard with bamboo lining as well, it was only a matter of time until a serious tragedy happened.’

‘There have already been more than 21 cases of porch subsidence in the borough of Southend this year due to over-delivery of take away leaflets.’

‘Thank heavens that the Southend Echo has got lighter and lighter otherwise many more people could have been killed.’